Teaching Consent to Small Children

carnivaloftherandom:

bebinn:

mysalivaismygifttotheworld:

afrafemme:

A friend and I were out with our kids when another family’s two-year-old came up. She began hugging my friend’s 18-month-old, following her around and smiling at her. My friend’s little girl looked like she wasn’t so sure she liked this, and at that moment the other little girl’s mom came up and got down on her little girl’s level to talk to her.

“Honey, can you listen to me for a moment? I’m glad you’ve found a new friend, but you need to make sure to look at her face to see if she likes it when you hug her. And if she doesn’t like it, you need to give her space. Okay?”

Two years old, and already her mother was teaching her about consent.

My daughter Sally likes to color on herself with markers. I tell her it’s her body, so it’s her choice. Sometimes she writes her name, sometimes she draws flowers or patterns. The other day I heard her talking to her brother, a marker in her hand.

“Bobby, do you mind if I color on your leg?”

Bobby smiled and moved himself closer to his sister. She began drawing a pattern on his leg with a marker while he watched, fascinated. Later, she began coloring on the sole of his foot. After each stoke, he pulled his foot back, laughing. I looked over to see what was causing the commotion, and Sally turned to me.

“He doesn’t mind if I do this,” she explained, “he is only moving his foot because it tickles. He thinks its funny.” And she was right. Already Bobby had extended his foot to her again, smiling as he did so.

What I find really fascinating about these two anecdotes is that they both deal with the consent of children not yet old enough to communicate verbally. In both stories, the older child must read the consent of the younger child through nonverbal cues. And even then, consent is not this ambiguous thing that is difficult to understand.

Teaching consent is ongoing, but it starts when children are very young. It involves both teaching children to pay attention to and respect others’ consent (or lack thereof) and teaching children that they should expect their own bodies and their own space to be respected—even by their parents and other relatives.

And if children of two or four can be expected to read the nonverbal cues and expressions of children not yet old enough to talk in order to assess whether there is consent, what excuse do full grown adults have?

I try to do this every day I go to nursery and gosh it makes me so happy to see it done elsewhere.

Yes, consent is nonsexual, too!

Not only that, but one of the reasons many child victims of sexual abuse don’t reach out is that they don’t have the understanding or words for what is happening to them, and why it isn’t okay. Teaching kids about consent helps them build better relationships and gives them the tools to seek help if they or a friend need our protection.

Teaching consent is applicable to all spheres of behavior, all ages, all genders, so why aren’t we instituting teaching consent and the right to boundaries to every age group?

thecityhorse:

fivegaited:

thecityhorse please tell me this is what your trampoline tutorials will look like

How did you get this clip I only recorded it yesterday

thecityhorse:

fivegaited:

thecityhorse please tell me this is what your trampoline tutorials will look like

How did you get this clip I only recorded it yesterday

an actual thing my thirteen year old brother just said

  • if girls are asking to be raped because their clothes don't completely cover all of their bodies, then boys are asking to be kicked in the balls just because they don't wear cups everywhere.
  • missbonniebunny:

It’s been a while since I’ve completed any art, so here have this lovely babe <3 First finished drawing of 2014.

    missbonniebunny:

    It’s been a while since I’ve completed any art, so here have this lovely babe <3 First finished drawing of 2014.

    lemondifficult:

    Applying for jobs is starting to feel a lot like

    image

    humansofnewyork:

"I once threw a pen at a kid’s head for raising his hand in class and saying that PMS should disqualify women from leadership positions."

    humansofnewyork:

    "I once threw a pen at a kid’s head for raising his hand in class and saying that PMS should disqualify women from leadership positions."

    katedrawscomics:

catbountry:

drtanner:

catbountry:

partymage:

melanijann:

fandomsandfeminism:

how-to-vidya:

The evolution of girl gamers

Boy gamers are so self-centered they act as though women haven’t been playing video games for decades, and then act horrified when the female gamers who have always been there actually become visible and vocal about the rampant misogyny that has infected the gaming world. 
Like seriously, how entitled do you have to be that women saying “it sure would be nice if I wasn’t treated like shit while enjoying the games I play” translates to “I must be catered to” when video games have LITERALLY been catered to men for decades? 

More like:
1993 - 64% of girls reported playing video games 
1996 - "home use had increased for fourth grade girls"
1998 - "both male and female adolescents play video games on a regular basis." 
1999 - "88% of the female college students … surveyed were video game players."
2007 - 20-47% of adolescent girls play video games
2008 - "94% of girls play video games"
2010 - "Forty percent of all game players are women." 
2012 - "Women 18 or older represent a significantly greater portion of the game-playing population (30%) than boys age 17 or younger" 
2013 -"adult women are nearly half of all video game players"
I didn’t get all the dates, but I think you can get the point.
Also considered posting my own personal gaming history, but I would’ve had to go back to the 80s for that. e_e

Been playing since I was old enough to hold the NES controller.

This chart does display some useful information, it accurately tells us how old the creator of the chart is. I’m guessing 24-25, which is way too old for this shit but explains why they seem to think girls only started playing games after he got out of high school.

Tumblr user catbountry makes an interesting observation.

Another useful observation? It was during the early 90’s that video games were becoming more aggressively marketed to boys.
So by 1995 the message that video games were for boys had taken root enough that you started seeing kids on the playground expressing befuddlement that girls could even play them.
So this chart tells us that this poor sap allowed himself to be so molded by advertisers that when the same girls he grew up with got old enough to be like “yo this is fucked up,” he cites his own experiences as evidence that they never liked them, despite the fact that those experiences were molded by advertisers chasing his demographic.
"You are wrong because as long as I can remember the vidya was marketed to me and now I’m noticing that you’re not happy about that."
You’ve been had, buddy. You’ve been played for a sap and you don’t even know it.

Dear child who made this original graphic- I am willing to bet that me and my schoolfriends were learning how to do fatalities on the Amiga version of Mortal Kombat before you were a twinkle in the milkman’s eye.  
Just because you ignore women doesn’t mean we’re doing nothing.

    katedrawscomics:

    catbountry:

    drtanner:

    catbountry:

    partymage:

    melanijann:

    fandomsandfeminism:

    how-to-vidya:

    The evolution of girl gamers

    Boy gamers are so self-centered they act as though women haven’t been playing video games for decades, and then act horrified when the female gamers who have always been there actually become visible and vocal about the rampant misogyny that has infected the gaming world. 

    Like seriously, how entitled do you have to be that women saying “it sure would be nice if I wasn’t treated like shit while enjoying the games I play” translates to “I must be catered to” when video games have LITERALLY been catered to men for decades? 

    More like:

    I didn’t get all the dates, but I think you can get the point.

    Also considered posting my own personal gaming history, but I would’ve had to go back to the 80s for that. e_e

    Been playing since I was old enough to hold the NES controller.

    This chart does display some useful information, it accurately tells us how old the creator of the chart is. I’m guessing 24-25, which is way too old for this shit but explains why they seem to think girls only started playing games after he got out of high school.

    Tumblr user catbountry makes an interesting observation.

    Another useful observation? It was during the early 90’s that video games were becoming more aggressively marketed to boys.

    So by 1995 the message that video games were for boys had taken root enough that you started seeing kids on the playground expressing befuddlement that girls could even play them.

    So this chart tells us that this poor sap allowed himself to be so molded by advertisers that when the same girls he grew up with got old enough to be like “yo this is fucked up,” he cites his own experiences as evidence that they never liked them, despite the fact that those experiences were molded by advertisers chasing his demographic.

    "You are wrong because as long as I can remember the vidya was marketed to me and now I’m noticing that you’re not happy about that."

    You’ve been had, buddy. You’ve been played for a sap and you don’t even know it.

    Dear child who made this original graphic- I am willing to bet that me and my schoolfriends were learning how to do fatalities on the Amiga version of Mortal Kombat before you were a twinkle in the milkman’s eye.  

    Just because you ignore women doesn’t mean we’re doing nothing.

    "I want you to
    fuck me
    senselessly
    because what logic
    do we need to
    undress each other-
    fingernails in back,
    mouthes going slack,
    bodies posed for an attack?
    What reason is there to find
    in the sweat we leave on each
    other’s skin?
    You are no formula.
    You are a language I want
    to learn how to moan in."
    Primal Desire | Lora Mathis (via lora-mathis)
    "Since her death in 1979, the woman who discovered what the universe is made of has not so much as received a memorial plaque. Her newspaper obituaries do not mention her greatest discovery. […] Every high school student knows that Isaac Newton discovered gravity, that Charles Darwin discovered evolution, and that Albert Einstein discovered the relativity of time. But when it comes to the composition of our universe, the textbooks simply say that the most abundant atom in the universe is hydrogen. And no one ever wonders how we know."
    Jeremy Knowles, discussing the complete lack of recognition Cecilia Payne gets, even today, for her revolutionary discovery. (via alliterate)
    "Nobody will protect you from your suffering. You can’t cry it away or eat it away or starve it away or walk it away or punch it away or even therapy it away. It’s just there, and you have to survive it. You have to endure it. You have to live through it and love it and move on and be better for it and run as far as you can in the direction of your best and happiest dreams across the bridge that was built by your own desire to heal."

    Cheryl Strayed, Tiny Beautiful Things (via adderalldust)

    For real though.

    (via fayedaniels)

    wearetherebirth:

Gpoy.
    delilahmidnight:

tvoltage:

bassfanimation:

cumber-porn:

princcehans:

overnight-shipping:

there-isnofate-but-whatwemake:

heyitsmario:

harrishun:

omomon:

mitzi—may:

If you see something like this, DO NOT CALL AN EXTERMINATOR!
Call a beekeeper, they can relocate the hive instead of killing them. Bees are dying at an alarming rate, please do not contribute to that! They are so important for our ecosystem!


yo fuck this i aint gonna call no beekeeper i’m moving before i’m dead

I’m going to call an exterminator so the exterminator can kill them. I’ll be able to sleep at night knowing that there are less bees in the world.

No bees = no food.
No food = no life.
Congratulations on destroying the world.

Because you seem to not understand that bees pollinate flowers and literally bees are the reason we have food.

Did you guys even watch bee movie

you really really must call a bee keeper!

My family’s house had it’s entire attic taken over by bees one year. They slowly started appearing in the house, and then they were everywhere.  We called a bee keeper, and he removed what he said was the largest domestic honeycomb/bee nest he’d ever seen.  I was so terrified I’d gone to stay with a friend.  My folks called me to meet the bee keeper, and he led me on the most magical journey through the house.  He explained the bees were harmless if you move calmly through them and don’t swat at or harass them.  He was only stung once because he accidentally put his hand down and smooshed one.  The bees landed on me, walked a bit, then buzzed away.  All honey combs and bees were safely removed and relocated.  Call a bee keeper, they are awesome!



seriously if youre afraid of them thats one thing but if you advocate for killing them i will personally deliver a wasp’s nest to your bedroom so you know what real terror is and then i will shit in your fridge because i can

    delilahmidnight:

    tvoltage:

    bassfanimation:

    cumber-porn:

    princcehans:

    overnight-shipping:

    there-isnofate-but-whatwemake:

    heyitsmario:

    harrishun:

    omomon:

    mitzi—may:

    If you see something like this, DO NOT CALL AN EXTERMINATOR!

    Call a beekeeper, they can relocate the hive instead of killing them. Bees are dying at an alarming rate, please do not contribute to that! They are so important for our ecosystem!

    yo fuck this i aint gonna call no beekeeper i’m moving before i’m dead

    I’m going to call an exterminator so the exterminator can kill them. I’ll be able to sleep at night knowing that there are less bees in the world.

    No bees = no food.

    No food = no life.

    Congratulations on destroying the world.

    Because you seem to not understand that bees pollinate flowers and literally bees are the reason we have food.

    Did you guys even watch bee movie

    you really really must call a bee keeper!

    My family’s house had it’s entire attic taken over by bees one year. They slowly started appearing in the house, and then they were everywhere.  We called a bee keeper, and he removed what he said was the largest domestic honeycomb/bee nest he’d ever seen.  I was so terrified I’d gone to stay with a friend.  My folks called me to meet the bee keeper, and he led me on the most magical journey through the house.  He explained the bees were harmless if you move calmly through them and don’t swat at or harass them.  He was only stung once because he accidentally put his hand down and smooshed one.  The bees landed on me, walked a bit, then buzzed away.  All honey combs and bees were safely removed and relocated.  Call a bee keeper, they are awesome!

    seriously if youre afraid of them thats one thing but if you advocate for killing them i will personally deliver a wasp’s nest to your bedroom so you know what real terror is and then i will shit in your fridge because i can